What You Prioritise in Your Relationship Prevails

When we prioritise the core values of love, care, trust and respect, we stop getting sidetracked by what we think are signs of one of these values while sacrificing the presence and importance of another. If we want our relationships to go somewhere good, healthy, mutual and fulfilling, we’ve got to keep it real. We’ll know, for instance, that we can’t, insist that a relationship without trust and respect is right for us. We’ll also know when someone is talking a good game but not following through with action. Superficial won’t be enough for us.

Our values are the through line that guides us to becoming more of who we are. We get to align with the people, things and experiences that reflect this.

Love, care, trust and respect set the tone for ourselves and our relationships. They set up the boundaries of how we’ll treat ourselves and be treated, guiding us to intimacy.

Crucially, love, care, trust and respect help us recognise what isn’t a fit and set the standard.

Relationships don’t just happen; they’re built on the consistent actions and intentions of each party. Feelings of something are backed up by consistent actions, mentality and attitude. It’s a gradual and continual rebalancing that occurs due to each partner having to choose between love, care, trust and respect, or pain, fear, guilt, ego and stories.

Two people coming from the same loving place do great things together. They co-pilot the relationship and navigate life’s inevitables together — stress, conflict, criticism, disappointment, rejection and loss. Even though they will undoubtedly each err and at times choose fear, they consistently return to the core of themselves and the relationship. We don’t get to experience this, though, if we keep settling for less than love, care, trust and respect.

For more on authentic, loving relationships, check out my book Love, Care, Trust and Respect.

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