Speculation surrounding Kate Middleton, whose whereabouts have been called into question after a lengthy absence from royal duties following a “planned abdominal surgery,” has enraptured everyone from Kim Kardashian to late-night hosts like John Oliver—who recently quipped, “There’s a nonzero chance she died 18 months ago.” But instead of ratcheting up the conspiracy surrounding the Princess of Wales, on Thursday, Jimmy Kimmel called for an end to any theorizing.
“We finally got a royal update on Kate Middleton,” Kimmel said during his Jimmy Kimmel Live! monologue. “According to a spokesperson for Kensington Palace, there’s a very simple explanation for Kate Middleton’s whereabouts: She’s been working from home.” He then asked: “How does a princess work from home? ‘I’m just going to stay in and wave?’” (Kensington Palace representatives told The Telegraph that Middleton’s WFH duties include looking after the Royal Foundation Centre for Early Childhood program Shaping Us, which focuses on the importance of early childhood.)
The late-night host then wondered why the world cares so much about Middleton’s location anyway. “Why do we have to know where she is? It’s not like she’s the bus driver,” Kimmel continued. “She had an operation, she had abdominal surgery. Maybe she has a colostomy bag and doesn’t want everybody to see it. I mean, really,” he added. “People are demanding she get dressed up and march through London so we can have a look at her. Leave this woman alone!”
Middleton’s hiatus from public life—and recent apology for altering a family photo released in honor of Mother’s Day in the UK after it was pulled from news agencies for manipulation—has been regular fodder for late-night TV shows like The Late Show With Stephen Colbert and The Daily Show. Even Kimmel couldn’t resist a jab, albeit at the expense of an American public figure, during Tuesday’s episode. “This shows you how different it is in the UK,” he said after breaking down the Middleton hoopla. “Kate goes missing for a few weeks, the whole country goes berserk. Meanwhile, we haven’t seen Melania [Trump] since 2021.”