Do You Want Similar Things Inside and Outside Your Partnership? – Dating Relationship Coaching & Advice

You may think you’re compatible and on the same page with a new partner and what you want as a couple, but it takes a lot of tough conversations to ensure that is the reality.

One of the reasons dating is so important is because this is when you are investing your time and energy to meet a potential partner who is on a similar page as you are. Some men and women put all their needs out quickly and have many expectations of what they are looking for in a committed relationship. Some people don’t have enough boundaries and end up in repetitive patterns that don’t work out. There is a happy medium, and it is as simple as learning how to listen to your instincts and openly communicate with someone you are interested in.

Pay very close attention to how the relationship evolves within the first 3 months. Is it moving along healthily, bringing you closer together because you have many things in common? Or, are you starting to understand that as a couple, you are quite different in many aspects of your lives? Having a few contrasting opinions or interests is acceptable, but your future goals should be on a similar path for your relationship to progress, and stand the test of time.

It’s one thing to have great chemistry in the bedroom, but if your ambitions, morals, and values are not in alignment, it will be difficult to sustain a long-term partnership.

As a couple, if you don’t have commonalities outside your home, it often pulls you in different directions and eventually alters the once harmonious home-life dynamics between you both. Having a few separate outside interests is healthy, but you should be able to stay connected by including each other in your endeavors once in a while. You should at least be discussing things, so they feel a part of it, understand what is going on, and can appreciate your enthusiasm. Just because they don’t participate in your outside activities, doesn’t mean they aren’t interested in them.

The importance of discussing future plans early in a new partnership.

When you sit down and have a conversation about the goals that you would both like to achieve in your life, is there some commonality? Are you on a similar page? It is so important to really hear what each other is saying, so there are no big surprises down the road.

1. Do they want a committed relationship and marriage?
2. Are you both sexually attracted to each other and on a similar page when it comes to intimacy?
3. Are you on board with wanting to start a family, or are you both in agreement about not having children?
4. Where do you want to live? This can cause many problems if you both want to reside in different cities.
5. Are you content with your careers, or do either of you have long-term university or future business goals that will take an extensive amount of time and compromise?
6. Do you like each other’s friends and family, and are you both openly accepted by them?
7. How well do you communicate as a couple? Do you have a similar style?
8. What do your gut instincts tell you? Do you ever get anxious or question being with them?
9. Do you trust them and feel secure with them for the most part?
10. Are there a few red flag warning signs about some of the differences that you both want for your future as a couple?
11. Are you compatible when it comes to the bigger priorities inside and outside your partnership?

Every one of those 11 points mentioned above is important to have discussed as a couple. Many of them can be deal-breakers, so it is imperative to communicate this to each other so you know where you stand. Leaving these conversations out of the mix will cause many problems in the months and years to come because of how crucial it is to be on board similarly within your partnership.

People change over the years, so it is crucial to stay openly connected with your partner!

Being aware of each other’s feelings as your relationship progresses should always be a priority. If you are cognizant of sharing your views and concerns, no one is left trying to figure out what the other is thinking. It is better to be honest if you are feeling a disconnect because it gives you both the chance to correct things.

Couples often make the mistake of thinking that things will be repaired on their own, and before they know it, their partner has checked out of the relationship. It’s certainly not a nice situation to be blindsided in this manner. If you stay on a similar path and truly respect each other, you have a great chance of having a successful, committed partnership.

*Please watch the video above to hear more about today’s topic.

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