Report: Trump, No Joke, Believes What He’s Going Through Is Like the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ


Happy almost Easter! Hey, speaking of Easter, do you know who apparently views himself as a Jesus Christ–like figure whose current trials and tribulations are not unlike being nailed to the cross? If you guessed “Donald Trump,” you guessed right!

Yes, Rolling Stone incredibly reports that the former president, who was indicted last week because he paid a porn star named Stormy Daniels $130,000 to keep quiet about an alleged Affair, was “offered a chance to surrender quietly and be arraigned over Zoom,” but chose “a midday, high-profile booking at the Manhattan courthouse” in order to make it clear that he’s being crucified—and is happy to take the heat so his followers don’t have to. (Note: To our knowledge, none of Trump’s supporters have falsified business records to cover up a six-figure payment to an adult film star while running for president of the United States.) “It’s kind of a Jesus Christ thing,” a source familiar with Trump’s legal team told the outlet. “He is saying, ‘I’m absorbing all this pain from all around from everywhere so you don’t have to’ [and] ‘If they can do this to me they can do this to you’…that’s a powerful message.”

While the Secret Service, which is required by law to protect Trump at all times, reportedly “argued in favor of holding the proceedings outside of court business hours, at night with minimal cameras and less risk,” Trump, according to Rolling Stone’s source, “wants to create the type of scene that he believes will galvanize his supporters.”

Anyway, speaking of Trump and the ole JC, here’s a favorite clip of the ex-president talkin’ Christianity.

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Speaking of things we’re not sure Jesus ever did…

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