Dirty Talk Advice ColumnFantasies are a potent thing. The fantasies that call to us can take up a lot of mental real estate. Sometimes they knock so loudly on the front door of our minds that we find ourselves entertaining them over and over again. No matter how hard we may try to ignore them, they show up and insist on being let in. How does one deal with fantasies that demand to be heard?

Some fantasies are fairly easily addressed and some fantasies can transform the way we look to the outside world. What do you do with a fantasy that will drastically affect your appearance? Should such fantasies be explored or should we ignore them and not engage? The dirty talk column has some answers! Grab your razors and let’s dive in.

“I’m a woman who wants a guy to shave my head. I’ve had a fetish for haircutting and headshaving since I was a teenager, and the more extreme the transformation the better. I’ve played around with other kinks before but have never gone for what is my ultimate fantasy. Is it worth making such a big change to my appearance just to fulfill a fantasy? If I go for it, should I save this to do with a more serious partner (I’m currently single), or would it be okay to look for people online who share my fantasy and see if they are a good fit?”–Want It Gone

If it sets your mind at ease WIG, your fantasy isn’t all that unusual or unreachable. I’ve run into many people that have a similar fantasy. Shaving someone down bare and smooth is such a common fantasy that I have lost track of the times people have emailed me to request that I shave my hair off. While I have never taken anyone up on this request, I am mentioning it because most people find it comforting to know they are not alone in their fantasies. The idea that we are an outlier in our desires can be very disconcerting and isolating.

Does Shaving And Relationships Mix?

Head Shaving LoveYour fantasy is such a common one that you are going to have no trouble in fulfilling it. Now that we have established that, let’s break down the realities of fulfilling this lifelong fantasy. I’m not going to advise you to wait until you find yourself in a relationship to explore this fantasy. The reason for that is that it’s going to be much easier to find someone willing to shave your head than someone to be in a relationship with.

Relationships are sold to us as something that is easy and effortless…you lock eyes with someone, know they are the one, and tumble into a blissful relationship. Nothing could be further from the truth. Relationships take work and require many varied components to be successful. Your fantasy only requires a single component—a willing head-shaving cohort. There is no shortage of people willing to do just that.

It is so easy to find someone willing to fulfill your Ultimate Fantasy that I want to focus more on the reality of getting a fantasy fulfilled.

Don’t Get Too Dazzled By Fantasyland

Dream Of ShavingIn Fantasyland, everything is perfect and airbrushed. Nothing ever goes wrong and everybody has flawless lighting. In reality, things are often anti-climatic, there are awkward pauses and people need breath mints. A fantasy we have spent a lifetime dreaming about can be very disappointing when we actually get it fulfilled.

It is because of this fact that I suggest you are actually better off trying to explore this fantasy with someone you are not attempting to be in a relationship with. This fantasy has taken up so much bandwidth that you have dreamed about it for your entire life. If you wait for it to be fulfilled by someone you are entering a relationship with, that will muddy the waters. You can want this particular fantasy fulfilled so badly that it clouds your judgment with potential relationships.

There is no point in having this looming desire affecting relationships. You are wearing Shaved Head glasses that are going to color your vision and selection process. You might find yourself entering a relationship not based on true compatibility, but rather on their willingness to grab a razor and shaving cream. Put down the razor and don’t let it be a factor in any future relationships.

Head-Saving Won’t Be The End Of Your Hair

Short HairHair grows back. A Mia Farrow pixie cut is very fashionable and is going to attract no notice. You can buy a wig or wear a hat. In this day and age, someone removing their hair isn’t even worthy of comment. If this act is something you have been dreaming about your entire life, go for it! It’s not going to be hard to do. There’s no shortage of people out there that would be happy to explore this fantasy with you.

Once you are on the other side of it, you might find that the reality of it does not match up with a lifetime of dreaming. It’s important to make your peace with that fact. And hey! You might find the transformation everything that you have dreamed of. I hope that is the case. There’s only one way to find out! The internet is full of fetish sites and message boards and it’s not going to take you long to find someone willing to go on this journey with you. Buy some hats, stock up on some shaving cream and go for it.

Keep it Kinky My Friends,

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Rain DeGrey

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